Have you ever walked away from a conversation and thought, “Something about that didn’t feel right”?
Perhaps you couldn’t explain why. Later, however, you realized that you had noticed a detail, behavior, or pattern that deserved your attention.
This week, we are beginning Step 4 of my 10 Steps to Self-Care Challenge:
“Trust your instincts.”
Trusting your instincts doesn’t mean assuming every feeling is a fact. Instead, it means giving yourself permission to pause when something catches your attention rather than automatically ignoring yourself.
WHAT ARE YOUR INSTINCTS TELLING YOU?
Our brains constantly process information from our experiences and surroundings. Consequently, we may notice a change in someone’s behavior, an inconsistency in a situation, or another detail before we can clearly explain why it stands out.
At the same time, stress, fear, past experiences, and anxiety can influence how we interpret situations.
Therefore, trusting yourself doesn’t always mean acting on your first feeling.
Sometimes trusting yourself means saying:
“I noticed this. Let me pay attention.”
That small pause can create room for a thoughtful decision.
PAUSE BEFORE YOU OVERRIDE YOURSELF
People often talk themselves out of concern because they don’t want to appear difficult, suspicious, or overly cautious.
Perhaps you are considering a commitment, relationship, purchase, job opportunity, or another important decision. Something feels uncomfortable, yet you start convincing yourself to ignore it.
Instead, pause.
Ask yourself:
“What exactly is bothering me?”
“Is there something I noticed?”
“Do I need more information?”
“Am I reacting to fear, or is there a real concern I need to examine?”
Those questions can help turn an unclear feeling into information you can evaluate.
GIVE YOURSELF TIME TO DECIDE
Not every decision requires an immediate answer.
When possible, create space before committing.
You can say:
“Let me think about it.”
“I need more information.”
“I’ll get back to you.”
“I am not comfortable making that decision yet.”
Meanwhile, use that time wisely. Gather facts, ask questions, pray, seek proper advice, and consider your options.
A trustworthy person or legitimate opportunity should generally allow reasonable questions. Therefore, pressure to make an immediate decision can be a reason to slow down and look closer.
DON’T CONFUSE FEAR WITH FAILURE
Sometimes we will pause, investigate, and discover that everything is fine.
That’s okay.
The goal isn’t to prove that every instinct was correct. Rather, the goal is to stop automatically dismissing ourselves.
Likewise, feeling nervous doesn’t always mean we should stop. New experiences can feel uncomfortable simply because they are unfamiliar.
Learning the difference takes practice.
BUILD TRUST WITH YOURSELF
Self-trust grows when we listen to ourselves and then make thoughtful decisions.
Start small.
Notice what you’re feeling.
Name what concerns you.
Check the facts.
Pray for wisdom.
Ask questions when you need answers.
Then make the best decision you can with the information you have.
You will not make every decision perfectly. None of us will.
However, you can learn to stop ignoring yourself simply because another person wants an immediate answer.
This week, when your inner voice says, “Pay attention,” don’t panic.
Pause.
Listen.
Investigate.
Pray.
Then decide.
Trusting your instincts can begin with something as simple as giving yourself permission to pay attention.
References
National Institute of Mental Health (NIMH)
Caring for Your Mental Health
https://www.nimh.nih.gov/health/topics/caring-for-your-mental-health
American Psychological Association (APA)
Stress
https://www.apa.org/topics/stress
Federal Trade Commission (FTC)
Consumer Advice
https://consumer.ftc.gov/
